The Unclosed Door-4 Ways to Find Closure Without an Apology

As originally published on blackandmarriedwithkids.com

Has someone you were dating or in a relationship with hurt you, walked away, and never apologized? The experience probably left you clueless and in the dark. While they went on enjoying life and continued to date other people, you couldn’t seem to move beyond what happened.

You may have become guarded, promising yourself never to become
vulnerable to another man or woman again. And, you may have felt an apology from them would bring you peace along with a better understanding of why they hurt you. Not to mention it helps to know someone cared enough to confront you with the truth.

The reality is that everyone who wrongs you won’t be accountable for their actions and address it. Finding closure without them isn’t impossible. Closure begins and ends with you. Below are a four ways to find closure without receiving an apology:

1) Disconnect

Separate yourself from the person who broke your heart. It’s crucial to remove that person and, yes, that means on social media as well. Eventually, you may be able to reconnect once healing has taken place but as you go through the process you should detach yourself from their life.

Also, be prepared to never speak to them again. You need time alone to allow your open wound to heal and what caused the wound can’t heal it. Once you remove yourself from your ex-lover, you will feel renewed and refreshed.

2) Find sanity

When someone leaves you out of the blue without an explanation, you’re left with a lot of unanswered questions. It’s easy to begin analyzing and dissecting the situation, trying to come up with the best answer.  That will drive you insane. There are some things you may never understand and you have to be ok with that. Don’t go crazy trying to make sense of what happened.  Let it go.

3) Check your pulse

Are you still breathing? If so, that means there’s another day to live for and another experience to learn from. It’s true that what doesn’t kill you has the ability to make you stronger, but only if you let it.

For instance, after healing from a bad relationship, you are more aware of the signs to avoid in your next relationship.

When you face pain, obstacles, and challenges, it builds character.

Your situation damaged you, but with time and a commitment to persevere there are ways to repair the damage. Your destiny is greater; one person can’t stop the show. Most importantly, once you move forward you will flourish in a way that you couldn’t have with them around.

4) Forgive

It’s difficult to forgive someone who never apologized, but it’s the most important step in finding closure. Pray constantly and ask God to remove any bitterness in your heart and replace it with forgiveness.

Ask God to have his way in their life and to bless them. There’s something powerful about speaking blessings into your enemy’s life.  It redirects the negative energy into positive energy. Forgive so you aren’t walking around with a chip on your shoulder. It’s not to benefit them.  It’s to benefit you.

It’s time to close the open door in your life, even without the apology you never received. Don’t let one person prevent you from entering into a healthy and happy relationship in the future. Tap into your inner strength and close the door today.  You can do it.

One thought on “The Unclosed Door-4 Ways to Find Closure Without an Apology”

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s